Dear Oprah

I wish I had my mom here with me to give a piece of most needed advice.
Or an Oracle. Or a very sincere friend.
A woman once I called a friend died last night.
She was not much older than me and she died during her sleep.
I like her family and I have good memories from the time we shared together so I believe I should go to her funeral, right?
On the other hand, I haven't seen her or her family for years and when my mother was sick and later when she passed away nor she or her husband or children came to my mom's funeral.
So I ask myself, do I really need to go to hers?
Deep inside me there's this woe that few people cared when my mom was sick and I was all alone taking care of her.
Few people offered me a shoulder to cry or a hand to help me.
And God, how lonely I felt.
But I have to tell you that Selma's husband or children will not be lonely at all.
They are part of that group I was once, PV, and being part of it, they are never going to be alone.
Why am I not part of this group anymore?
Because I felt betrayed by them. It's a long story I don't feel talking about now.
Sometimes I think about if I die suddenly who will attend my funeral and you know? It doesn't matter.
Because those who love me they have to show they love me while I am alive.
They must show my kids that they love them while I am alive.
Later, it is good to know you have friends but it's better to know that your friends where there for you when it mattered.

Dear Oprah

I've just seen a recording where you went to a WW meeting and took everybody by surprise.
I started to cry because oh God, I would like so much to meet you in person and I just don't think this going to happen.
I really really would love to meet you.
I don't know why but you seem to be the kind of person I would like to have as friend.
Today was a hard day with many different emotions mixed but anyway I am grateful because I could do most of the things I needed to do.
It was a real miracle that I did what I did and I thank God.
I really am grateful.
It's something I've learned with the book The Magic, to be thankful for all the things everytime, everyday.
So, when something starts to go wrong I say thank you for all the other things that are going well.
Thank you Oprah for being such an inspiration.
Love

Dear Oprah

Yeah, I know it's been a while but my daughter came and I spent 10 amazing days with her.
This week I worked as a crazy woman and I've just arrived from a friend's birthday party.
I have to say: I hate parties.
My daughter said that I am introverted, I think I am anti-social.
Here in Brazil, it is extremally hot so being in a place outdoor without A.C. with the music too loud and lots of people it's really not my cup of tea.
I'd rather stay home, watch a movie or read a book.
Said friend it's 3 times divorced, 58 years old and tonight she introduced us to her new boyfriend.
God, he is the kind of a man I would never look twice.
You know the kind of gooey man?
I am too old to see things like that.
Sometimes I think that I'll end my life as the lady with the cats.
I do prefer cats, dogs, birds, even fishes instead of people.
I know, I am not a nice person.
Love

Dear Oprah

How are you doing?
Here is a much calmer week but the good news is that my daughter arrives tomorrow.
I am so excited to have her here for 10 days.
We are going to do many things together and we are going to Coldplay concert on the 7th.
It's going to be great.
I am still trying to find a way to visit my son in July.
I don't know how but I know that I really want to go.
Have you ever been in Quebec during summer?
It's wonderful.
Quebec is not a big city so you can walk around pretty easily and visit it in about two days.
There are so many wonderful parks and, of course, the summer festival.
I love the city but I cannot see myself living there.
It's too much like France, you know.
And I like big cities, I like a place more vivid.
It suits my son tough.
He loves being there.
Me? I think it's great to visit but boring to live in.
That's all for now.
Love

Dear Oprah

Happy Easter!
This is my favorite holiday. Even more than Christmas.
Because if in Christmas we celebrate Jesus being born, Easter means that He died and resuscitated for us.
He gave His life for us and is there something that shows more love than giving your life for somebody?
When I was a kid Easter was much more than chocolate eggs.
On Friday, all the people in my family above 10 years old would fast.
Yeah, my grandpa was adamant about it and we would spend the day trying to be silent and to meditate.
Of course for us, kids, it was hard.
At midnight, those who didn't decide to go to sleep in fast would eat something not very heavy, but sometimes we were so hungry that we would eat and eat and eat.
Saturday was spent playing happily and the women would prepare the feast for Sunday lunch.
On Sunday, first thing in the morning we would go to church. After that we would look for our chocolate eggs and later all the family around the table we would have a wonderful lunch.
Normally there would be lamb but for those who didn't like it there would be plenty of other food.
All my home was decorated in white and yellow.
I tried to keep the tradition until my husband passed away.
He died on Easter week. He was buried on a Tuesday after Easter and later my father-in-law and my mother-in-law both, also died on Easter week but in different years.
Even if I think it's beautiful (and I really do) that all of them died during Easter it is hard for my kids and so we don't celebrate as we used to.
This year is a bit different for me.
In 20 years is the first time I spend Easter without my mom and my children are in different countries.
I'll spend it all alone.
But I am not sad.
No!
I am grateful that we are all in good health and living our lives as happy as we can.
I will prepare a good lunch for me and will prepare some dishes to put on the freezer as my daughter is going to arrive on Thursday.
God bless you dear Oprah and may you have a wonderful day.
Love

Dear Oprah

Today somebody asked me how I deal with people who betray my friendship.
I didn't answer because my answer would shock the person. What happens to me is that the person who betrayed me simply stops existing for me.
He/she dies for me.
And not even a death that is going to make me feel sad.
It's like that person has never even taken a part in my life.
When I like somebody I do it with all my heart. I give this person my best. I really invest myself in the friendship.
So, if this person betrays me it shows me that I didn't evaluate him/her well when we first met.
I didn't pay attention to the signs because there are always signs.
Then I try to learn from my mistake and move on.
I am not going to shed a tear for someone who doesn't value my love, my loyalty, my friendship.
It has happened two weeks ago and that's why this person asked me about it today.
Maybe I am a bit hard on how I react but I'm 58 years old. I am too old to waste my time with people who doesn't deserve it.

Dear Oprah

I haven't talked to you the last days and, unfortunately,  it was not because I was busy with work. On the contrary, only students, but I was a little too down to write.
No, I still don't have work but I am sure I've done everything in my power so now it's up to God.
I sit down and wait and while waiting I take care of my house, myself and my dog.
In 9 days my daughter will be here.
Isn't it wonderful?
I started doing a journal for all my blessings and also meditating.
I don't want to take medicine for depression anymore.
You know, it's frightening not knowing if I am going to have money to pay my bills. It's easier said than done to believe and let everything in God's hands and not worry, but I swear I am trying.
Another problem that makes me sad is Jack, my dog.
He is old and has problems on his back paws. Sometimes he just can't walk and crawls and it is a terrible thing to see.
This isn't the only problem he has. He has problems in his eyes and he has a poor hearing.
But he is still happy, and joyful and I just don't have the heart to put him to sleep.
Sometimes I wish I had somebody to help me take decisions but...there's nobody.
The other day I was thinking - if I die here it can take days for people to realize I am dead.
Some days I just don't leave the house so it's normal for my neighbours and the concierge not seeing me for two or three days.
My friends, they normally talk to me on the weekends.
Ok, if it is a class day my students are going to realize something is wrong but I don't know what they could do.
Also, my daughter she calls me every day. I have to send her my friends phone number so people can try to get in.
Not that I believe I am going to die soon, but... we never know.
Yesterday I saw a video you published on FB and you said you were in Chicago.
Have you not moved yet or are you going to live in Colorado and Chicago alternating?
Or maybe it was just a recorded video you had done a long time ago.
Here in Brazil, we are still having so many problems in politics that it is hard to believe things are going to change anytime soon.
I went to the streets with many other people to protest against the government.
We do need things to change or we are not going to see out economy getting better anymore.
President Obama is in Cuba.
What a progress you American people have made these last years in the matters of relationship with countries you had problems with.
First Russia, now Cuba.
I hope from the bottom of my heart that you are not going to have Trump as president because he will destroy everything president Clinton and Obama made.
Anyway, I am not an expert in politics.
Oprah, I hope you have a wonderful week.
God bless you.