Dear Oprah

I'm sad!
I am very very sad.
On Saturday my God-daughter and her sister are getting married. They are my dear friends' daughters and, of course, I am invited.
Buta I am fat.
I am obese.
I have nothing to wear and even when I find something I look like a mattress with a rope in the middle.
It's so unfair.
I don't eat a lot. I swear.
I don't eat hamburgers and french fries on a regular basis, only occasionally. I don't eat a loaf of bread, or butter, or even mayo.
I love sweets but even that I don't eat as a crazy person.
I don't eat a box of chocolate.
Not even a bar.
Ok, I don't exercise. I hate exercises and I am lazy.
I have a slow metabolism and I should eat as a bird for not exercising and don't be fat.
As I told you before I am a widow, my kids live in another country, my mother passed away last year and I have few friends.
I love my life. It's not a burden for me to be single or to be alone.
I love reading and watching movies and I do love my work as a translator and as a teacher.
So I don't understand why I have to be so fat.
Why do I have to pay this price?
I tried everything and of course, for a while, it works.
WW? Yes, I tried.
And medicine and all the crazy diets you can imagine.
The only thing I've never tried was to spend the day in the gym.
My arms are like a mass of cellulite and my thighs... They look like an old tree with all the trunk full of nodes.
I guess I have cellulite even in my brain.
So, yes, I am unhappy. I am disgusted of myself, I am sad and desperate.
And on Saturday I probably won't go to the wedding. I probably will stay home feeling miserable.
My mother used to say that I have breasts on my back.
I love her but she could be mean.
She used to say that I shouldn't wear white from head to toe because I would look like a refrigerator.
Before getting married I was on a diet so strict that I was extremely thin in order to be able to wear my wedding dress and not look like one